“Man is free at the moment he wishes to be.” This is so true. While many of us believe we are trapped in our circumstances, the truth is we created those circumstances out of the choices we have made. It takes courage to admit we take a big role in creating our reality. It takes even more courage to decide to do something about it – to choose something different.

“The secret of happiness is freedom. The secret of freedom is courage.” – Thucydides

This month I encountered a person who was very stressed by their job. Things were not going smoothly creating an even more pressure on an already overwhelming workload. The demands on this person’s time seemed unrelenting. They were about ready to snap. She couldn’t leave the job because the money was good and necessary to pay her mortgage and support her two sons. The only possible solution she could see was to win the lottery so that she could retire and get away from it all. While I believe anything is possible, I also know one can not create a lottery win in such a non-joyful state. Was she doomed? Of course not.

The first course of action was for her to realize she had chosen this – maybe not consciously but she chose it just the same. This person had chosen to feel trapped by her circumstances. She had chosen to ignore all the wonderful things she enjoyed about her job and that she was very good at her job. She had chosen take on responsibility for outside things that were not in her control like how the stock market was affecting her workplace. She had chosen to keep looking at her growing to do list instead of taking account of all she had already accomplished and allowing that to give her momentum to go forward. She had chosen to feel victimized by the workload instead of celebrating her skills and ability to do it. She had chosen to isolate herself instead of asking for help or delegating what could be delegated. She had chosen that there were no other options available to her except to suffer to the point where maybe she would have a nervous breakdown and then could be free of it all for awhile while she recovered.

Those are a lot of choices, not necessarily great ones, and all easily rectified. This brave woman decided to take ownership for her circumstances and made a few different choices that immediately changed her life. She decided to remind herself of the help and service she was giving her clients and that she was amazing at what she did. She decided that even in these tough times, she could feel like she was making a difference by calming fears and giving perspective to those around her. She decided to take note of all the headway she was making and to take one day at a time. She decided to choose balance and took time for some self-care by going for a much needed massage. She decided to let go of control of a few things and gave some files over to a co-worker with some capacity. She decided to open up to the possibility that change could happen for her whether it be a change in jobs or a change in the workload, or a change in how she felt about everything. She opened up to the possibility that the Universe could give her what she wanted without compromising, without taking a cut in pay, and without it getting harder. She chose to believe in the possibility that this was temporary and that new, beautiful things were coming to her all in good time. She just had to relax and allow the possibility to exist. She decided to take account of her blessings and be grateful for all that she did have. For she had much – a loving family, a beautiful home, a high-earning job, and many clients who appreciated her to name a few. She chose peace. She chose joy.

The moral of her story is that in the end the choice for peace and joy is always ours. Peace and joy are not things we have to earn. They are things we have to choose. Our freedom is absolute. We are free to choose to feel whatever we want. If you don’t like your choice, you have the freedom to choose again.

“Freedom is not worth having unless it includes the freedom to make mistakes.” – Mahatma Ghandi. So, give yourself a break, admit your mistake, and choose to feel better right now.