Defining Your Path

One question I often ask my clients is to picture the path they are walking on. When I ask what it looks like, some common answers are, “It’s rocky.”, “It’s uphill.” or “It’s dark.” Then I ask them to imagine the path they would like to walk on. Inevitably they will answer that it’s bright, smooth, or extends far out into the distance. Then I will ask one more question: “Is this an easy path or a hard one?” The answer is usually “a hard one.” And I say, “What if it were easy?” And then I get the “OMG, I never considered that it could be easy before” look of amazement.

It is amazing how many of us are walking around believing that if we are to attain what we want it has to be hard or that there has to be a struggle to get there. It’s like we have bought into some belief that if we are to gain what we want, we have to pay a price, and the price is suffering in one form or another. Hogwash. (I would use a stronger term but I’d like to keep this professional. ? ) Life is meant to be easy. Life is meant to be fun. Life is meant to be filled with moments of joy. Life is meant to be experienced in a way that brings the most gratitude into our hearts. Does any of this sound like adding some struggle will help get you there? Of course, not. In this context, if we were to add struggle, the joy immediately diminishes. It is not the answer. The answer is to create an easier path in our minds and believe in its possibility.

Your mind is your creative tool and what you picture in your mind is what you will create. If you can create a picture and attach some passionate emotion to it, you will create it faster. Unfortunately, most people picture what they don’t want then passionately fight against it. (ie)”This isn’t fair and I’m mad about it.” (creating more unfair experiences and more anger faster). Not what you want to be doing.

Recently, I was talking with a fellow who wanted to bring in more clients. He had pictured this as a tough project involving a lot of grunt work. When I asked him to picture this path of gaining the clients, it was rocky. When I asked him to smooth out the path and make it an easy one, his whole outlook changed. He became excited by the possibilities of clients finding him. He became energized and eager to get started. He changed his mind, which changed his experience.

One night while putting my lively 6 year old daughter to bed, I asked her to imagine the path she walked on. When I asked her what it looked like, she said, “Bouncy.” Her answer couldn’t have been more fitting. My daughter certainly bounces happily through life just as a six year old should. When I imagined my path, there was no bounce in it at all. In fact, my path was made of what appears to be gold, which sounds lovely, but at closer look, was more like gold concrete – no flexibility, no give, no soft place to fall, and really hard on the joints! So I changed my path to one with more bounce in it. Immediately, it felt more fun and that it had the ability to leap me forward effortlessly. I liked that. We have so much to learn from children.

What are you picturing that could use some tweaking? What path are you walking on? What path do you want to explore in 2012? Whatever the path, make it an easy and enjoyable one, and maybe a little bouncy too!